Dreaming in Pantone

~ { THE BODY PARTS } ~

2010-08-25T11:42:00.000-07:00

~ { B R A I N } ~
I smashed my head on a wall to split my head.
I made way through the cells to enter
I found a room filled with boxes
Nervously tearing Them open
There where boxes filled with childhood toys. ..
One box was so bright from meditation , I opened it and found God …
Some were filled with magazine issues…
Some boxes that were empty …
Some were filled with money..
little boxes that were pure green..
The room was not so well lit , there were corners I couldn't see.

~ { H E A R T } ~
I stabbed my own heart ,
Made a large wound ,
expecting to find the Red District
but found a Dead Black old raped raisin
dusted off the Tobacco Tar
All I could see are the wrinkles from every hand that touched it…
People , Passion and hope come and leave
They all leave their wrinkles
Spare me the anti wrinkle cream Recommendation.

~ { E Y E S } ~
I focused on the Pixels
impressed by the slideshow
This Movie Theatre has some deep scenes
What more could be seen
I'm all out of popcorn
don't wanna get bored with routine
I need to change this movie
In some scenes I covered my little sister's eyes
Hopefully she will never get to see this shit
What Rate should I give this film!

~ { L I P S } ~
Rotten air filled with curse words keep trying to escape
The tongue keeps trying to hold in Saliva it might clean this place up..

~ { W O M B } ~
With my own bare decisive Hands
I ripped through the fat tissue to
Reach down to the egg that always reminds me
Im nothing but a chicken
On top of my lungs I scream
IS THERE A LITTLE ME GROWING IN HERE!?
Ecos came back to me
what would happen if I just fry this egg!
how much will I regret it later?

~ { B A C K } ~
I caught a reflection of what could be a spine
but found stabbed fragments with friends signature on it.
Notre Dam is a beauty queen next to me.
Thanks precious dad for having my back.

~ { V A G I N A } ~

I lay on my back and spread my legs…

Out comes the clear flood …

I'm sinking in there

feels like a water park

I'm thinking of shutting down

at least till I find a vine to replace the raisin….

it astonishes me how simply people look at mirrors ….
if I bought a mirror that was already fragmented …
will it be more clear?

being average

2010-02-26T06:23:00.000-08:00

first 1/4 century

first crush. first love.unsuitable. different mentality. too conservative. too open. shallow. to deep to laugh. summer fling. one night stand. travel buddy. fuck buddy. too old. too young. cheap. beater. mental abuser. physical abuser.no chemistry. not my fantasy. drugie or rather not a drugie drunkie or rather not a drunkie. intimidated. intimidating. local. nonlocal. just friends. friends with benefits.friend when needed. only friends. mother fucking player. too big of a loser. ...

round 2? stability? screw that.

The rope I climb has no tied ends to hold my fate. I keep reminding myself that self-preservation is one of my mind duties yet the tar keeps blocking the gateways . Transic tones from the last grave I danced in sets me gliding between heaven and hell..
wouldn't I want to go to heaven before I die? those seconds of white teeth and pulsing eyes.
to hear my own internal laughs. that some of you might hear.

>>>> if only I could only enjoy the silence of average.

layers of my heart

2010-02-26T06:14:00.000-08:00

The rooted tree on the sidewalk carried the carvings of the unnoticed feelings you have for me that is still there but is forgotten. Three times today I looked outside the window side to see if it is changed ..it has not..but you have changed.

With the needle you hold carrying the blue & red threads you made your amature stitches on the organ that used to be my heart. I throw in my laundry basket my body parts to clean it from your calculated touch. I keep the tough spots for me to go down on my knees,raise my dress, spread my legs and scrub my organs till the bones are loose. Would you not forgive me for my inablity to forgive you for the loose dager you held behind my back and stabbed me with when the clock struck twelve. or the stone you hid to club me with when we would shiver?

Do you still want to pin me to the wall and wrap my weak bones with the red quilt meat..

brighter shasow

2009-09-12T19:48:00.000-07:00

The reality of my imagination is a drowned line which the pigeon pooped on.
I coughed my funny fears with traces of sweet purple blood that shaped the word expired love on the dry floor branded with MADE IN VENUS barcode.

my waist expanded with the lines of the crew that worked on creating my belly button...there they hid in the core of my USB fridge, with fat data

The sticky sugar is not my favourite...DAMN IT HURTS
It hurts as much as the itch inside my envious brain drives me numb of the ants crawling in my veins., the peacock standing on my nose spread its feathers to tell you absolute no..in the grey matter ..your mental abuse matters it crowded my patriotic statues that hails racism..your ideolistic unrythmic poem did not fit their criteria...standing next to the old red lady shedding waves from the cans that stabbed her from the last shit I took in the stall

the white rose is desaturated

I exhale the tar i hid last month in my wide open cuboard, please untie my little toe from the chains that tied it instead of your big clown feet...

I caged the blind pigeon to set it free to the truth of my unwanting desire to leave...but did

It's done, I told the the third wall in the basement not the fourth.

body language.

2009-09-11T16:25:00.000-07:00

In the middle of the noisy crowded living room I was disturbed by the phone ringing, tv too loud to actually listen, my sister's friends ringing the house bell one after the other and my parents sharing their thoughts on top of their lungs. I was trying hard to concentrate on my inner thoughts.

Today in the middle of my daily noise pollution all was silenced in my head by Akram khan and Sylvia. The breath taking meditation on love and obsession. a display of speed, precision and tender body power.

It shocked me that beyond all cultures and different regions, relegions, languages and ideals one thing was able to transend all these differences and find a common essence...POWER STRUGGLE ...

I found myself and everyone around me relating to the sense of tension in a starting relationship the height of authority desire and the sudden discord..followed by t

he deepest connection. All expressed with body language that could make anyone from anywhere tear down from a heightened reality.

I think it touched me more because I felt I was there in the moment with them fighting on discording silently hoping to connect....

I just saw part of it on you tube and hope one day to see it live...also recommend seeing zero degrees

file:///Users/macbook/Desktop/sacred_monsters.jpg

Design Exhibtion

2006-11-08T03:28:00.000-08:00

Chai & Ba a tea place has offered me the space to have a design exhibtion. I would love if all my deviant friends come and tell me what u think of the designs I will show.

Details:

SUN 19th NOV 2006
8:00 p.m - 11:00 pm
Location: CHAI & BA is located in rawda street ( previously called sharee3 al ameer 3abdallah) it is before toki and beside PORTFINO and the imate shop.

Hope to see u there :)

mornings

2006-09-25T16:02:00.000-07:00

I woke up this morning
I realised I'm not the person who I wanted to be
What a horrible thing to be...

2 b continued ...

wind in a bag

2006-09-09T04:08:00.000-07:00

SO I'm back ..
The funny thing is I could have stayed a week more in prague..
thinking that this saturday my college starts,
trying to control my bohemian personality and take the mature decision
I descided to come back instead of accepting a free stay at my uncles house and attend the madonna concert.
...the hilarious part was discovering that college starts next saturday ...
meaning it was simply a stupid decesion not to have stayed the extra week...

welcomed with jeddah's tradmark ( welcomed by the sweaty air the moment you step out of the plane)
and Jeddah's wonderful news of the new committie of moralaities ( lajnat el adab)
which annoyingly is just for jeddah which will apply some weired rules like putting back barcades in resturants, women are
not allowed to go to resturants alone,no shisha ....etc....alot of stupidity that I was glad to leave long ago in riyadh,
" giving back ethichs to jeddah people"
( talk about going a couple of hundred steps back and some regional racism)

AS I heard this news my mind drifted to the cafe in prague ...where I was sitting in the old town surrounded by
culture and art,sipping my latte, smoking my cigar and reading my book.
doing some doodles and sketches inspired by the breath taking surrounding
wondering how far are we here from this sort of life....

Is this the solution, give " them " what theny want, leave the counrty and go to europe.
even though I do have this option I chose not to...still trying to figure out why....

fainting from the news and heat I wish I packed an extra bag .....some lovely wind from prague
wind in a bag....despite the over wieght

leaving logic and reason

2006-08-28T12:24:00.000-07:00

I'm an hour away from my way to the airport to prague.....
ticket (check)
passport (check)
bag all the way (check)
my determination to have fun (check but needs explanation)

when we traveled the whole big family, my uncle would always go to us children in the plane and make
us scream on the top of our lungs ( WE R DETERMIND TO HAVE FUNNNNNN!!)...... lol I know

the song madonna ( travelingggg leaving logic and reason) humss in my head....

bye everyone

summer twist

2006-08-23T00:37:00.000-07:00

at 7:00 am the sun passing through the window woke me as it did for the past two months
automaically i would look at my watch, stand up and start my day.

Today was different I was waken up by the bloody sunlight..
but toda I forced my self not to look at the watch but pick up the book
that I've been wanting to read but never had time too (book titled: Saudia Arabia Exposed)
Today my summer officially begins.

I finished a huge project I was working on with Abbar and Zainy
they had this company called e-monee that was launching from scratch
so I got to witness a rise of a company. and design it as a brand tooo
most fun was designing the ATM card and the cartoon instructional booklet...

and i got to learn a bit of spanish from the people in the office....

it was a great experience but now it is time to relax..
I'm looking forward to my week in prague (cezch republic)

has anyone been there b4 ...could recomend places to go?

when apple is no longer a fruit

2006-08-17T18:30:00.001-07:00

MAbroook 4 me!

it is a true cause for celebraion . I just got the latest apple laptop.
MACBOOK PRO ....such a beautiful machine
There is something in the way it is packaged how every thing is slick and smooth
it's a playboy
I wouldn't mind having an affair with it and cheat on my printer.

getting wierd......

Garbage for my puke

2006-08-12T12:16:00.000-07:00

Today after work, at caspersI met a bunch of us highly motivated girls and guys sat with the intention of creating an international youth society. Yes, I know what is passing through your head another club ,another passionate attempt that will end with the pass of time after we finish puking out all the heavy emotions bothering us.

THATS IT! we will call this group SAUDI GARBAGE ( where we take in all your puke. )

Okay enough with the shock disgusting ways....

I thank ALLAH for his gift, the gift of finding the abitlity to have a fresh new strength and hope each time someone proposes an idea to make Jeddah a better place, wether naive or inexperineced I wouldn't mind listening to the high charged creative thoughts expressed in such meetings.

Okay Since this is my starting post I must introduce you to my ways,
I will say what is in my head and if you don't like it..
keep ur puke for the garbage....

portfolio pic

2006-06-23T13:06:00.000-07:00